MARK'S MESSAGE
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He was in the first third
grade class I taught at Saint Mary's School in Morris, Minnesota. All 34 of my students
were dear to me, but Mark Eklund was one in a million. He was very neat in appearance, but he had that 'to-be-alive' attitude that made even his occasional mischievousness
delightful. |
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Mark talked incessantly. I
had to remind him again and again that talking without permission was not acceptable. What impressed me so much though, was his sincere response every time I had to correct
him for misbehaving -"Thank you for correcting me, Sister!" I didn't know what to make of it at first, but before long I became accustomed to hearing it many
times a day. |
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One morning my patience was
growing thin when Mark talked once too often, and then I made a novice-teacher's mistake. I looked at Mark and said, "If you say one more word, I am going to tape your
mouth shut!" It wasn't ten seconds later when Chuck blurted out, "Mark is talking again." I hadn't asked any of the students to help me watch Mark, but since
I had stated the punishment in front of the class, I had to act on it. I remember the scene as if it had occurred this morning. |
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I walked to my desk, very
deliberately opened by drawer and took out a roll of masking tape. Without saying a word, I proceeded to Mark's desk, tore off two pieces of tape and made a big X with them
over his mouth. I then returned to the front of the room. As I glanced at Mark to see how he was doing, he winked at me. That did it!! I started laughing. The class cheered
as I walked back to Mark's desk, removed the tape, and shrugged my shoulders. His first words were, "Thank you for correcting me, Sister." |
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At the end of the year, I
was asked to teach junior-high math. The years flew by, and before I knew it Mark was in my classroom again. He was more handsome than ever and just as polite. Since he had
to listen carefully to my instruction in the "new math," he did not talk as much in ninth grade as he had in third. |
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One Friday, things just
didn't feel right. We had worked hard on a new concept all week, and I sensed that the students were frowning, frustrated with themselves - and edgy with one another. I had
to stop this crankiness before it got out of hand. So I asked them to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each
name. Then I told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down. It took the remainder of the class period to finish
their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed me the papers. Charlie smiled. Mark said, "Thank you for teaching me, Sister. Have a good
weekend." |
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That Saturday, I wrote down
the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and I listed what everyone else had said about that individual. On Monday I gave each student his or her list. Before
long, the entire class was smiling. "Really?" I heard whispered. "I never knew that meant anything to anyone!" "I didn't know others liked me so
much." No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. I never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter. The exercise had
accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with themselves and one another again. That group of students moved on. |
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Several years later, after
I returned from vacation, my parents met me at the airport. As we were driving home, Mother asked me the usual questions about the trip - the weather, my experiences in
general. There was a lull in the conversation and Mother gave Dad a side-ways glance that simply says, "Dad?" |
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My father cleared his
throat as he usually did before something important. "The Eklunds called last night," he began. "Really?" I said. "I haven't heard from them in
years. I wonder how Mark is." |
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Dad responded quietly.
"Mark was killed in Vietnam," he said. "The funeral is tomorrow, and his parents would like it if you could attend." To this day I can still point to
the exact spot on I-494 where Dad told me about Mark. |
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I had never seen a
serviceman in a military coffin before. Mark looked so handsome and so mature. All I could think at that moment was: 'Mark I would give all the masking tape in the world
if only you would talk to me.' |
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The church was packed with
Mark's friends. Chuck's sister sang "The Battle Hymn of the Republic." Why did it have to rain on the day of the funeral? It was difficult enough at the
graveside. The pastor said the usual prayers, and the bugler played taps. One by one those who loved Mark took a last walk by the coffin and sprinkled it with holy water. I
was the last one to bless the coffin. |
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As I stood there, one of
the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to me. "Were you Mark's math teacher?" he asked. I nodded as I continued to stare at the coffin. "Mark talked
about you a lot," he said. |
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After the funeral, most of
Mark's former classmates headed to Chuck's farmhouse for lunch. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting for me. "We want to show you something,"
his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket. "They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it." Opening the billfold, he
carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times. I knew without looking that the papers were the ones on
which I had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said about him. "Thank you so much for doing that," Mark's mother said. "As you can see,
Mark treasured it." |
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Mark's classmates started
to gather around us. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, "I still have my list. It's in the top drawer of my desk at home." Chuck's wife said, "Chuck
asked me to put his in our wedding album." "I have mine too," Marilyn said. "It's in my diary." Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her
pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. "I carry this with me at all times," Vicki said without batting an eyelash.
"I think we all saved our lists." |
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That's when I finally sat
down and cried. I cried for Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again. |
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Written by: Sister Helen P. Mrosla |
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The purpose of
this story is to encourage everyone to compliment the people they love and care about. We often tend to forget the importance of showing our affections and love. Sometimes
the smallest of things, could mean the most to another. Express your love and caring by complimenting and being open with communication. The density of people in society is
so thick that we forget that life will end one day; and we don't know when that day will be. So tell the people you love and care for, that they are special and important.
Tell them, before it is too late. |